When Sober Curious Strikes Past Dry January

Firstly of 2025, the previous US Surgeon Common issued an advisory on the hyperlink between alcohol consumption and cancer risk. Whereas this can be a sobering name to motion, there isn’t a denying that sober curiosity has elevated not too long ago. From Dry January to extra manufacturers creating alcohol-free drinks to the rise of mainstream mocktails, now greater than ever even informal drinkers have gotten sober curious and inspecting their relationship with alcohol.

Final yr in Episode 146 of the FBG Podcast, Sobriety Coach, and Founding father of Sober Wild, Krysty Krywko, Ed.D, joined our EIC Alison for an interview on sobriety. At the moment we’re persevering with this dialog with Krysty. Dry January has handed however definitely not the questions on what we will do if we’re excited about a sober (fully alcohol free), or damp (a discount in alcohol consumption), life. 

Tam: Ought to we method ingesting as all or nothing, particularly if we’re sober curious?

Krysty: I feel it’s a really private resolution, however should you’re any form of a daily drinker (which means three or 4 nights per week “simply to unwind”) then alcohol is impacting the best way you’re feeling – mentally, emotionally, and bodily – your physique simply doesn’t know there’s one other approach. In the event you’re not ingesting throughout the week, however then ingesting a few bottles of wine over the weekend, you by no means actually get the prospect to see how your physique and thoughts reacts to no alcohol. Anna Lembke, in her ebook, Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence, talks about how “abstaining from our drug of selection for at the very least 4 weeks provides clarifying behaviors. Perception that merely will not be potential whereas we proceed to make use of.” In different phrases, you haven’t any thought how shitty you actually really feel while you’re utilizing a substance that’s making you’re feeling shitty. It often takes just a few weeks to your physique to regulate to the truth that you’re now not consuming a poisonous substance.

Tam: Are there issues/finest practices to go from Dry January to extra of a Damp February and past? 

Krysty: So, I don’t actually know the reply to that query, it actually is dependent upon what your motivation was for Dry January. Was the plan to only see should you may make it with out ingesting for 30 days? Or had been you in search of actual well being advantages? Or did you understand that your ingesting has elevated over the previous few years and you wanted to take a break?

Moderation, which is absolutely what Damp February is all about, doesn’t work for lots of people. In the event you spend plenty of time bargaining with your self at any time when alcohol is concerned, which ends up in plenty of “guidelines” round your ingesting, you would possibly need to take a step again.

You won’t even pay attention to these guidelines. They’ve simply change into a part of your inside chatter. That chatter would possibly sound like this:
I’m not going to drink on my own.
No ingesting earlier than 5:00 p.m.
No onerous alcohol throughout the week
I’m solely going to drink white wine (or beer, or vodka, and so on.)
I can’t have greater than two drinks on per week night time.
I can’t drink greater than two nights in a row. 

The top days of my ingesting had been stuffed with elaborate and arcane guidelines that had been consistently shifting as I broke one after one other. I used to be letting myself down every day, and that form of self-disappointment was like a relentless stream of micro-cuts to my soul.

Take a second and take into consideration why you’re placing so many guidelines round your ingesting. You would possibly simply resolve that it’s now not price it.

Tam: If somebody is studying this pondering “I don’t have an issue with my alcohol consumption however need to take a extra conscious method to what I eat/drink,” what questions ought to be explored when excited about alcohol consumption? 

Krysty: One of many first issues we have to do is transfer away from the language round ingesting and the idea that there are “downside drinkers” after which everybody else. This results in disgrace, stigma, and judgement.

A way more helpful, and reasonable, mannequin to make use of in relation to speaking about alcohol is the concept of ingesting occurring on a spectrum. That’s the place the concept of “grey space drinker” emerged from, which encompasses everybody from the every-now-and-then drinker to those that are bodily hooked on alcohol. The fantastic thing about this mannequin is that you just don’t have to hit any kind of a all-time low earlier than you may discover your relationship with alcohol, you get to resolve at any level on the spectrum what’s best for you.

In the event you’re able to get trustworthy with the position alcohol performs in your life, I might counsel sitting down with a pen and paper and answering the next questions. Get inquisitive about your self, and take the time to reply truthfully. Don’t cloud your responses with disgrace, or judgement, or what your bestie goes to assume. That is about you and the one life that you’ve, and whether or not or not you desire a poisonous substance to play a job within the creation of that life. 

Is alcohol nonetheless working for me?
How is alcohol making me really feel?
What areas of my life has alcohol taken over?
Does ingesting align with the individual I’m now?
What would “future you” inform “current you” on this scenario?

Tam: What if our mates have gone again to ingesting after Dry January, however we try to proceed. Do you will have options/suggestions for the right way to make this a part of my life-style with my ingesting mates? 

Krysty: You would possibly want to search out new mates – haha. However, significantly, if your mates really respect and help you within the selections you make in your life, then it shouldn’t be an issue. However, in the event that they’re regularly attempting to push you to start out ingesting once more, whining that you just’re not enjoyable anymore, or that one shot of tequila gained’t do any hurt, you then would possibly have to rethink who you’re spending time with. It’s essential work out for your self what you need to do with the time that you’ve, and the folks you spend it with. 

Moreover, in case your buddy group is closely immersed in ingesting tradition – which means most social actions revolve round alcohol – you then would possibly want to search out some new peeps that love to do various things.

Tam: Any favourite “drink” hacks to switch that Friday night time cocktail? 

Krysty: I’m probably the most fundamental sober individual round – and I’m pleased with ingesting a seltzer on my sofa to unwind after a busy week. However, I do know that folks have totally different wants, and I get that within the early days of going alcohol-free you may want one thing a bit extra thrilling. Fortunately, the alcohol-free market is on fireplace! There are such a lot of merchandise in the marketplace – assume flavored seltzers, glowing teas, alcohol-free beers, wines, and spirits, kombuchas – I actually may go on and on. I’m regularly impressed on the locations the place I discover alcohol-free drinks – Goal, Dealer Joe’s, Complete Meals, common grocery shops, and native alcohol-free bottle outlets are beginning to provide such all kinds. My solely warning is be intentional when utilizing alcohol-free merchandise, particularly issues like alcohol-free wine or beer. In the event you’re downing a bottle of alcohol-free wine most nights of the week, it’s form of like ripping off one bandage and placing on one other, and also you would possibly need to discover why you’re caught in the identical behaviors. 

Did you do Dry January this yr and preserve a dry or damp February? What’s your sober curious hack? ~ Tam